Ok, ok - I got it!

On August 1st, I attempted to climb to the top of Grays Peak - my first 14er.  I didn't make it to the top, but I made it up very high and had an amazing experience.  The coolest part was my satisfaction with what I had accomplished.  I didn't feel disappointed at all - just proud of myself.  I had a little "a-ha" moment with God at the end of the hike.  Reinforcement of my belief that the journey is the reward and even though I didn't achieve my goal, my effort was huge and what I did achieve was good enough. 

I'd been riding that high for about three weeks when I had an off day and on a whim decided that I didn't just want to reach the top of Grays Peak - I needed to reach the top of Grays Peak!  And it was something that I needed to do all on my own!  I love the women who went with me on my first attempt and I wouldn't change it for anything, but this was something different.  This was something I needed to do!

Of course, that didn't last long - I'm a little freaked out about hiking alone, so I quickly started to try to figure out who I could coerce into going with me - again.  Unfortunately, as far as my schedule went, my only two options were Saturday or Monday - Labor Day weekend.  Hmmm...holiday weekend on short notice - maybe I should just attempt it on my own.  Then my friend Ann called.  (We haven't hiked together, but we'd like to.)  We were talking about other things and she mentioned that she needs to make some plans to do things to keep herself busy.  Inspiration hit me.  She didn't have any plans on Monday and when I asked her if she wanted to climb a 14er with me, she practically jumped through the phone!

By the time we reconnected she had checked out the weather and the trip reports on Grays Peak and was making her list of what to bring.  Unfortunately something weird was going on with the road up to Grays and we'd have to hike up the road for an additional mile and a half just to get to the base of the mountain.  We quickly readjusted to climb Mt. Bierstadt.  Originally my heart was set on Grays, but hey - a 14er is a 14er.  Emily and Carole had said that it was easier than Grays, so I got a little more excited.  Mt. Bierstadt summit, here I come!!!

Of course, I hadn't forgotten everything I had learned, so I started prepping Ann, "Even if we don't make it to the top, we'll still have a good hike.  Let's just have fun."  She responded, "We can do this!"  (yay - motivation for me)  I was getting excited to meet my goal and to spend time with Ann, but I also kept warning myself that it would be "enough" to try.  I got everything prepared the night before and got to bed at a reasonable hour.  I woke up at 3:00am, got ready, finished packing my backpack and drove the four minutes to Ann's house. 

(Here's a bit of information for you - I've only been to Ann's house like three times - in the daylight - just so you know.)

So I get to Ann's house and....it's completely dark.  Not one light on in the house.  Hmmm.  So I call Ann's cell (no land line).  No answer.  Hmmm.  I call again.  Still nothing.  Hmmm.  Ok, so I'm guessing that she overslept - I'll just go pound on the door.  This is the right house, right?  Yeah, I'm on the right street.  Right?  All of a sudden, doubt washed over me.  If I'm wrong, and this isn't the right house, I'm pounding on the door of a stranger at 4:00 in the morning.  Yikes!  I called her cell again.  Still no answer.  Hmmm.  I just couldn't do it.  This whole thing took about fifteen minutes and the longer I sat there, the more sure I was that it was her house, but I still couldn't do it.  Just in case I was wrong.

For a nano-second I thought about heading up by myself, but I couldn't do that to Ann.  She had been so excited and she would be so disappointed.  So I called one more time and left a message that I was going back home.  I read a book for a bit - intending to call her every half hour, hoping that eventually it would wake her.  However, sleepiness won out and I climbed back into bed.  As I laid there, I thought about my conversation with God at the end of my last hike and I could almost hear Him chuckle.  "Didn't you hear me?  Didn't you get what I was trying to tell you?"  His voice was light, like I was enjoying a conversation with a friend.  He wasn't mad, it was more like, "Hell-o?"  I smiled at the next thought that came to me.  "You're not going to the top today either."  With that I fell asleep.

I woke up to the phone ringing at 6:30.  Ann did set her alarm clock, she just forgot to turn it on.  She still wanted to go up, so I got up and picked her up just after 7:00.  We got Starbucks and were on our way.  At this point, neither of us had any expectation of making it to the top and the great part is that we were both ok with that.  We laughed about how I probably looked like a stalker sitting outside her house.  She was disappointed that she overslept, but we were both determined to have a great day.  We started out at the base of Mt. Bierstadt at 9:19.

Since neither of us were in a hurry, we hiked at a slowly.  Whenever one of us broke a sweat we slowed down.  It was a leisurely pace and we enjoyed the beauty around us and each others company.  We're both going through some changes right now, so sometimes our conversations got pretty deep.  Sometimes we were silly.  We laughed and we cried.  I was reminded again about how sometimes being on a mountain with someone isn't about hiking.  I took lots of pictures and she spun around singing, "The hills are alive - with the sound of mu-sic..."

As for the beauty of the mountain, I have to say once again that I am ashamed that I live so close and this is the first time I've been here.  The mountains were just stunning.  I could see Grays Peak and Torryes Peak and it was pretty cool to be able to pick them out - to be able to say, "I climbed that!"  It was different because there weren't any of the pretty flowers that were in the meadow at Grays.  Of course, that could just be that we missed them.  It was also so much more open, not nearly as much foliage.  You could see people on the trail almost all the way up the mountain.  The path was much, much easier.  I have complete confidence that I could've made it to the top, if we had left on time.  It wasn't nearly as steep as Grays or as rocky - much less mental stress as to where you were stepping.  The Sawtooth is between Mt. Beirstadt and Mt. Evans.  It was breathtaking.

We stopped at about the half way point, had lunch and headed back down.  An extra fun tidbit for me - as we were coming down a small group of high school kids were behind us and they were singing "Under the Sea" from the Little Mermaid.  My friends and I (dorks that we were) watched that movie over and over in high school and knew all the songs by heart.  I immediately flashed back and those memories put a smile on my face.

The only thing I didn't like about this hike is that to get back to the beginning of the trail you have to climb UP.  Ugh!  When you're on the last leg of a hike and feeling like you're almost there, it's just mean to make you climb again.  I'll be honest, I grumbled more than a bit and Ann was nice enough to not get frustrated with me.  We finally make it back to the car.  The entire hike took about seven hours.

We went to a Christmas store in Georgetown and had dinner at Euro, causing us to miss most of the holiday traffic on the way home.  What a great day!!!

To bring us back full circle, I re-read my Grays blog and again I have to thank God for being so patient with me.  One of the things that I love is that He keeps giving me opportunities to understand what I'm supposed to be learning.  And there's one thing that I mentioned in my Grays blog, but I didn't focus on it: contentment.  Yes, I think I was supposed to get the things that I mentioned at the beginning of this post, but there was something I had missed.  The way I felt at the end of hiking Grays was content.  My life is good!  Sometimes even great.  When I had that weak day, when I decided that I HAD to get to the top - I wasn't content.

I'm in a good place and I need to enjoy where I am - like I enjoyed yesterday.  There was no rush, no goal to attain, no disappointment in myself.  Am I going to stop trying to improve in certain areas of my life?  No.  But I need to be content with the accomplishments I have made.  Ok, ok - I got it!